I use Message Alerts - it lets you schedule what sort of alert you get based on rules you set up. It works on email, pin, sms, and phone. There's a temporary mute option - vibrate only for x minutes, then it goes back to noisy mode automagically.
I have mine set to vibrate only after 8:00 in the evening and go completely silent after 11:00, then back to full-on noisy mode after 8:30 in the morning.
If anyone "pages" me through voice mail, it will send an alert regardless of hour (emergency, after-hours support calls only, please!). A call from any of my brothers' phone numbers will ring until 11:00, and a call from any of my wife's numbers will ring at any hour.
It's very flexible. (Sorry if I'm sounding like an ad again. I'm not affiliated in any way, I just really like the software and want to see it continue to be supported.)