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Old 07-11-2009, 02:52 PM   #21
mriff
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Wow! Glad we're in the Sensitive Discussions area. Funny though. Embarrassingly funny.
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Old 07-11-2009, 02:54 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by test54 View Post
That should be true but it's not. She is stunning though.
Quote:
he's married, not dead.
Ok, yes, you are both correct. Perhaps I should have said 'less reason to look'. And I agree, she is stunning.
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Old 07-11-2009, 04:40 PM   #23
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lol, that is bad but very funny adorkable. & so true.
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Old 07-13-2009, 09:04 AM   #24
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Bad but funny joke, adorkable.

Here is one I got earlier today.

Washington D. C. was named in a health survey Tuesday as having the highest rate of sexually transmitted disease of any city in the United States. The government is clearly to blame.



You can't screw that many taxpayers each day and not catch something.
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Old 07-13-2009, 11:45 AM   #25
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Ick. Ick, ick, ick!

I feel bad for laughing.
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Old 07-20-2009, 07:57 AM   #26
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Here is one I received from a buddy this morning:

Subject: Email Warning.





I just received this Warning from a friend.



Sounds serious enough that you should send it to everyone on you address list.



If you should receive a Email titled, "nude photos of Nancy Pelosi."



Don't open it.



It could contain nude photos of Nancy Pelosi.
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The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
When you take things for granted, the things you are granted, get taken.
Even a mosquito doesn't get a pat on the back until it starts to work.
Too many people miss the silver lining because they're expecting gold.
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Old 07-23-2009, 07:20 AM   #27
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pretty funny
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Old 09-08-2009, 08:24 AM   #28
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A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, ''What are all those clocks?''

St. Peter answered, ''Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.''

''Oh, whose clock is that?'' asked the man pointing at a clock whose hands were not moving.

''That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.''

''Incredible, and whose clock is that one?'' asked the man pointing to a clock whose hands had hardly moved.

St. Peter responded, ''That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire Life.''

''Where's Barrack Obama's clock?'' asked the man.

''Obama's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.''
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The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
When you take things for granted, the things you are granted, get taken.
Even a mosquito doesn't get a pat on the back until it starts to work.
Too many people miss the silver lining because they're expecting gold.
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Old 09-27-2009, 07:56 PM   #29
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A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot.

The robot clicked to attention and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"

The man thought a moment then replied, "A martini please."

The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.

The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"

The man answered "oh,about 164."

The robot then proceeded to discuss the 'theory of relativity', 'inter-stellar space travel', 'the latest medical break throughs', etc.......

The man was most impressed.

He left the bar but thought he would try a different tactxxx8230;

He returned and took a seat.

Again the robot clicked and asked what he would have? "A Martini please."

Again it was superb.


The robot again asked "what is your IQ sir?"

This time the man answered, "Oh about 100".

So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing, the latest footballand baseball scores, and what to expect the Sox to do this weekend.

The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool....

Again a martini, and the question, "What is your IQ?"??

This time the man drawled out "Uh..... bout 50".

The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked, "Are you still happy you voted for Obama?"
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